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Submitted on
January 27, 2013
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76 (who?)
Do you remember;
It was September and I was seventeen.
I was gnarled into the corner of a bus
Mithering away at my gloomy mood;
Trying to shake the oppressive landscape in my mind.

It was unexpected.
A blow,
A shock.
It was unexpected to see you there.

You were folded primly onto a bus shelters seat
With her hand enveloped in yours
You both lifted your other hands, synchronised,
And waved to me with your familiar smiles.

I was surprised.
Was stunned.
Was overjoyed,
I was surprised to see you there.

Your grey hat tipped so rain slipped off
And her glasses whitening with the steam of her laugh
I just looked at you, gluttonous,
I absorbed every detail of that moment.

It was unexpected.
A blow,
A shock.
It was unexpected to see you there.

But there you were nonetheless,
Eighty years old, clasping hands awaiting a bus
My eyes leaked they were overfull of the sight
Of two people, quietly, silently in love.

I was surprised.
Was stunned.
Was overjoyed,
I was surprised to see you there

As your love reached out and took me too.
Osmoticly my body filled with it
And I preserve it still, it fuels my blood.
You are in my blood, you are in my heart.

You don't remember.
How you read to me, or I to you.
How you guided and taught me.
You don't remember. I'll remember for you.
Deep breath. The phrase "I will remember for you" came to me when I was thinking about my grandfather, to whom I am very close. I began to think of all the precious memories I have with him throughout my life, from childhood to this very week.

My grandfather has vascular dementia and sadly it seems like every week he forgets more things. How to make coffee, how to get dressed, how to play cards... but I will never forget.

This poem mostly describes a real event, I was on the bus on my way to college and when I looked out of the window at a bus stop, there they were. My grandparents. At 7 in the morning. Sat, holding hands, smiling and waving, waiting for a bus. It was so bizarre to see them out of the context I knew them in, they so rarely left their house especially without myself or my mum to take them. The image of them holding hands and waving to me will stick strong in my heart for a long time.

So its okay if you forget, if you call me the wrong name or ask me where my husband is. I will smile and make you a cup of coffee and start the same conversation twenty times so that you don't realise you are doing it and get anxious. I won't mind.

I recently read one of those pictures that floats around facebook, its not a meme just like a long saying that people pass around but I cant find it, it went something like..

I was there when you were learning to walk, hold my hand when I get unsteady as I did yours.

It goes on with lots of different examples about caring for elderly relatives and how they cared for us when we were children so to try to be patient with them. This resonated deeply with me. My grandfather is like a father figure in my life, and he taught me a lot and supported me through a lot. It is no burden to make him smile a couple of times a week now.

New word! I love it when a new word happens!

Osmoticly: with the characteristics of osmosis.
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LadyNeytiri Jul 16, 2013  Student General Artist
I understand this so well...
My grandpa had a tumor in his brain and I was at my grandma and grandpa's house almost everyday
over the summer to help take care of my grandpa and for a while it looked like he would live for a couple more
years but then as the summer progressed he just got worse and worse in the end he basically lived in a wheel chair.
He could hardly pick up a glass of water without spilling some because his hands shook so bad, we had to grind up
his food until it was mush so he could eat and he couldn't speak. At the time I was only a freshman in high school doing this.
It really took its toll on me mentally. Then before that Thanksgiving came he lost all of his will to live and died in the night.
Somehow I had worked past that over the summer because I think in my heart I knew he wasn't the same person
as there were times I swore he didn't recognize me at all. But then when he died it finally hit me that he was gone, forever
and I sobbed. My grandma is now starting to have problems because I think she is still in depression.

This poem made me think of my grandparents, like something they would do...thank you so much for this.
It really made me smile~ I wish you luck with your grandfather, I know it won't get better but make sure to take full
advantage of the good days!
:tighthug: It is difficult, so difficult. I'm sorry that you can relate to this. :tighthug:
LadyNeytiri Jul 19, 2013  Student General Artist
It is :hug: I still have a hard time with his death because
there had been so many years that he couldn't talk, I
don't even remember what his voice sounds like. :tighthug:
I do miss him though but I try and remember the good days
that he had.
:tighthug: That's good, I know thatll be the hardest thing. Remembering the good.
LadyNeytiri Jul 19, 2013  Student General Artist
:tighthug: It is. There will always be things that will bother you for years
and some of them the simplest of things. Like for me my eldest cousin-who
was nearly married for a year at about 26 years old- used to mess up my hair
when he would walk by...But he shot himself days before their year anniversary...
And I'm blabbering. Sorry. Thank you for listening...well I guess reading if you put it literally.
If you ever need someone to talk too I will listen ^_^
Don't worry about it :tighthug:. Those things do bother us. I lost my sister when I was 7. I'm 26 now and I still think about it every month. sometimes every day.
LadyNeytiri Jul 19, 2013  Student General Artist
:tighthug: Aww~ How old was your sister?
I have that same problem with a dog that died the
summer before I went into second grade and I will soon
be a senior in High School.
she was 9, I was 7, but because she was severely disabled and our whole family was focused around her care I felt older and she felt younger
(1 Reply)
lysaa Jul 10, 2013  Student Photographer
Hi there! Just letting you know I've featured this piece in my most recent journal: [link] :love:
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