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Literature by BrookeBroken

Poetry, Stories and Quotes by tijgerjente

Writings by LilYellowInk


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Submitted on
March 18, 2013
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1.0 KB
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2,478 (1 today)
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Just give me one dream that isn't see-through.
One substantiated claim to reality,
that I might hold onto life with.
Every quivering cell, mid-osmosis, begs you
for a shred of dignity with my tea.
Just one chance for something heavy,
something hard and room temperature. Real.
I don't want to look through my day dreams
and see someone else's face there.
I don't want to dream of those people
who may make, or break me, in the future tense.
I am tired of milky white and reflective black.
It is time for a life of colour and hope -
and not looking back to see if the past
matches up with the jigsaw map to the end game.
I want to be in the game, participating,
feeling, like I might make it there one day.
Just give me something, that I can hold onto;
something harder to see through than a whisper
of that voice in the back of my mind that says
Maybe.
Maybe i'll make it.


My friend Nichole has her skype message as "Just give me one thing that isn't see through". I have no idea what it means or where she got it, but I took it to this place. Soo, thanks Nichole / wherever she got it from. Hopefully it's not a quote from her awesome writer boyfriend. That would be awkward O_o
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:iconwritingobsessed:
WritingObsessed Featured By Owner Jul 8, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
This is really nice. It has kind of a simple message that many have written about before, so it surprised me when I found how unique it was. I really like it, it has a charm to it. Especially those last few lines. :)
Reply
:iconbloodshotink:
BloodshotInk Featured By Owner Jul 12, 2013
Grins, yay! Thank you so much!! I am thrilled you enjoyed this.
Reply
:iconwolfmoon35:
Wolfmoon35 Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I love how wistful and whimsical this poem is. I could feel and relate to the deep longing for wishes and dreams to become reality and not just fantasy or fantasies. Beautifully well done. I hope that you, and everyone for that matter, will not just "make it" but also enjoy and cherish the road to get "there." Or at least somewhere while "living in the here and now"... :)
Reply
:iconminninnewah:
minninnewah Featured By Owner Mar 19, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Love the concept and what you did with it! Such great imagery
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:icongeorgiath:
GeorgiaTh Featured By Owner Mar 19, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
wow i loved it
Reply
:iconanzelya:
Anzelya Featured By Owner Mar 19, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
So many comments :) I guess you really nailed this one!
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:iconlodfile:
lodfile Featured By Owner Mar 19, 2013
Love this!
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:iconbloodshotink:
BloodshotInk Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2013
<3 I'm so glad!
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:iconlilfixit:
lilfixit Featured By Owner Mar 19, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
I was going to say make the maybe a yes. Then I realized that's what the poem is about.
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:iconbloodshotink:
BloodshotInk Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2013
:] Thank you <3
Reply
:iconwinterleave:
WinterLeave Featured By Owner Mar 19, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
beautiful! you will make it, Kate, no doubt!
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:iconbloodshotink:
BloodshotInk Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2013
I hope so. :]
Reply
:iconevarusso:
EvaRusso Featured By Owner Mar 19, 2013
astounding
Reply
:iconbloodshotink:
BloodshotInk Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2013
:blush: Thank you!
Reply
:iconkerorogunsofan57:
kerorogunsofan57 Featured By Owner Mar 19, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
beautiful.
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:iconbloodshotink:
BloodshotInk Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2013
:] Thanks
Reply
:iconsweetsandcharades:
SweetsAndCharades Featured By Owner Mar 19, 2013
It is beautiful :clap:
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:iconbloodshotink:
BloodshotInk Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2013
yay, thanks!
Reply
:iconraeri-chan:
Raeri-Chan Featured By Owner Mar 19, 2013  Student Digital Artist
This is what I needed to read today. Beautiful. :)
Reply
:iconbloodshotink:
BloodshotInk Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2013
:D yay! Thank you!
Reply
:iconraeri-chan:
Raeri-Chan Featured By Owner Mar 23, 2013  Student Digital Artist
You're very welcome, sweetheart. :hug: Keep it up.
Reply
:iconguesswhatirok:
guesswhatIrok Featured By Owner Mar 18, 2013
I love this
Reply
:iconbloodshotink:
BloodshotInk Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2013
yay :D
Reply
:iconanimerocks234:
AnimeRocks234 Featured By Owner Mar 18, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
this is amazing!
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:iconbloodshotink:
BloodshotInk Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2013
Thank you! Gosh!
Reply
:iconanimerocks234:
AnimeRocks234 Featured By Owner Mar 23, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
your welcome!
Reply
:iconabsolutelybeastly:
AbsolutelyBeastly Featured By Owner Mar 18, 2013  Student General Artist
This is too beautiful for words. <3
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:iconbloodshotink:
BloodshotInk Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2013
:giggle: Well thank you!
Reply
:icontheredstripe:
theredstripe Featured By Owner Mar 18, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I absolutely love this! I don't do free verse very often, but when I do I try to reach for something as great as what you wrote here. In a way it reminds me of a song called "Something of Ours", though that song has a different meaning behind it. Still, though, it's amazing :D
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:iconbloodshotink:
BloodshotInk Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2013
Smiles shyly, thank you so much. It's always nice to try and convert people to the wicked ways of free verse. :giggle:
Reply
:icontheredstripe:
theredstripe Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
You're welcome (: I'm gonna start following you, okay? Okay. Lol.
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:iconbloodshotink:
BloodshotInk Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2013
shweet. :giggle:
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:icontheredstripe:
theredstripe Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
And by "follow" I meant watch :p haha
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:iconmortalshinobi:
mortalshinobi Featured By Owner Mar 18, 2013
beautiful. really does feel like life and how very difficult it is overall and never finding that thing to hope for. nicely worked.
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:iconbloodshotink:
BloodshotInk Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2013
Thank you so much!
Reply
:iconmortalshinobi:
mortalshinobi Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2013
welcome. :)
felt something like what i've gone through. so i really can attest to this piece of literature.
Reply
:iconkiku----honda:
kiku----honda Featured By Owner Mar 18, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
THIS IS AMAZING. THANK YOU SO MUCH!
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:iconbloodshotink:
BloodshotInk Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2013
no thank YOU!
Reply
:iconkiku----honda:
kiku----honda Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
:iconhappyhappyplz:
Reply
:iconwingz69:
WiNGz69 Featured By Owner Mar 18, 2013  Student Writer
.
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:iconbloodshotink:
BloodshotInk Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2013
Tilts her head
Reply
:icontmntleolei03:
TMNTLeoLei03 Featured By Owner Mar 18, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Oh beautiful. I'm captivated.
Reply
:iconbloodshotink:
BloodshotInk Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2013
:blush: yay!
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:iconkuraitenshiv:
KuraiTenshiV Featured By Owner Mar 18, 2013  Hobbyist
i love this its very good
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:iconbloodshotink:
BloodshotInk Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2013
:] Awesome!
Reply
:iconsophiatlantic:
sophiatlantic Featured By Owner Mar 18, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I can really relate to what your saying... I'm crying right now. Thank you for writing this.
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:iconbloodshotink:
BloodshotInk Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2013
:tighthug: I'm sorry I made you cry! :hug:
Reply
:iconsophiatlantic:
sophiatlantic Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Aww, don't be sorry! I love this piece!!
Reply
:iconnella-chan:
nella-chan Featured By Owner Mar 18, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
Very interesting how you kept going, works and flows very thoughtfully. Beautiful. :)
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